And so, I shall wait

As I peep through the window of the 5th floor at this night hour, I realize how insignificant a being I am in front of the huge cosmos. A wave of emotions sweeps me across as if I can never grow. Looking at the grand starless sky, I simply wonder if God will ever be able to find me in His own maze. I shirk my head in anguish and settle down to write this blog………..

Long back, I used to read every spiritual material that fell on my hands. Now, I've dumped all my bookish knowledge in the mental bin. With no offence meant, they appear meaningless to me of late, especially when all others are seriously reading, discussing, arguing and contemplating.

Many times, the new knowledge that I have learnt from Guruji is at the verge of being spilt but then I contain myself because I contend within that there might not be serious takers and I do not wish to pass them on as one more additional information only to be wiped out from the memory. I have learnt one important lesson in life - spiritual knowledge should be parted with only when it is yearned for.

Well, if in case I want to read any of the scriptures, I go through one or two lines all alone staring the blank wall most of the times coupled with restlessness due to my inability to grasp the truth practically. For self-motivation, there are many other ways wide open and I do emphasise the day's thought(s) in my own ways.

Sometimes I do feel that I am struggling all alone with all my incapacities, inabilities and limitations with all the bondages physical and mental, what with the world around is busy with its ever growing needs, wants, desires, emotional upheavals, accusations, conspiracies, possessions, possessiveness etc. There’s nothing wrong with that of course for this world is meant to be so, but I become very tired at such times, for there’s none around who is as serious as me. Or at least I feel so. But then I am a part of this world and hence I accept everything as such. I am also aware that I am no angel too.

Though I don't understand why I am writing this blog itself on the first hand, I am clear on one thing. I am not feeling lonely. It’s just the feeling that I am alone. Of course, I am aware that I have chosen a less travelled path that should be trodden all alone.

The opening para appears so childish now….. I know that God / Light knows about my existence. :)

And so, I shall wait.

Poetic touch

Last Monday, I watched the film ‘The Last Samurai’ with my friends again. Katsumoto, the great Samurai struggles hard to complete a poem which he manages at the verge of death with words ‘They are all perfect.’

My throat was choked. I can understand the joy of revelation that he experiences in extreme pain.

Poems are not for everyone. It is not mere coining of words or phrasing of coherent thoughts. Generally, they are not created to impress anyone.

There is subtleness of Truth, an inexplicable awe, an undeniable love, a feeling of helplessness, an irresistible pain and a whole array of uncontrollable flow of sublime emotions in those wordless words. Though they appear to be dream creations and unfit for the present world, they are of course beloved creations of their mystical creators. Not many can absorb the flashes of brilliance from those seemingly meaningless words.

Poets cannot be made. They are inborn with such faculties. In other words, poems are born out of intuition.

That’s how and why the seers have left behind innumerable compositions to express that One Truth.

Those seers, I am sure, would have been poetic in their every single thought and action.

Because, they are all perfect.

The smiling Sun

Every sunrise and sunset is not only a reminder of the relative world that we live in but also the limitedness of our life. In fact, the star doesn’t sink into the sea nor rise from the mountains. It remains shining in its own might and right in spite of its births and deaths on the horizon with full awareness. Not only does it display colours in different combinations every time, it gives life sustaining energies and light day after day to all beings of our planet without a break.

I too take birth, live and die millions of times.

Does my life package have a scientific attitude to validate the absolute truth and a poetic heart to express the relative truths?

The Sun within waits with a smile for an answer....

Happy Valentine's Day

Divine music surpasses all musical wonders of this world, so it is said. It is also said that the call of the divine music is easily recognised by the one who has a divine ear to enjoy. I am sure that those who possess divine ears have the best understanding and appreciation for earthly music than anyone else in the world.

Likewise, human love is best appreciated and understood as a glimpse of the divine love by saintly and divine beings. I realized this truth theoretically on a Saint Valentine’s Day.



It is a wonder to realize that I had been experiencing divine love of the Enchanter of the Universe for eons through many phases and faces of human love unconsciously.

If Saint Valentine was persecuted by the ignorant for his Love for the divine, I am really glad that I made a beginning on this day towards the divine, persecuting my myths, ideas and boundaries out of Love.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Connections

A thought or a series of thoughts popped up during my silence today. It is this…

I am a partaker of karmas from parents, friends, groups, country and humanity. Simultaneously, my karmas are shared by the above respective orders too. In that case, what is my duty?

1) My every single thought has an impact in the universal consciousness. That goes to prove that any positive or negative vibration created by me has an effect on others. So it is my greatest responsibility to experience, carry and spread Light wherever I am.

2) On the flip side, I have to exercise my ‘choice’ wherever possible and minimize my agitations and karmas caused by others if any, which in turn will indirectly reduce their burden of karmas and agitations too.

Both the aspects are in my hands. I need to be extremely alert to be truthful to every word.

Let there soon prevail only soul connections and not karmic connections.



With the blessings of the Master, this wish should become a reality soon.

P.S. : Picture courtesy Google Images (apologies if it is a copyrighted one)

Teasing tears...

Yesterday’s online Sunday class (07/02/2010) was one of the most touching ones I have watched since this January. I didn’t know what to do and how to improve myself. Like a child, I broke down. My sobs triggered to the extent of bringing migraine into my head. But I refused to take any medicines and depended entirely on the Great Light. There was a murmur felt in the head till night but I refused to acknowledge it.

It was not the migraine that is important to worry about. It was those tears……



I understood clearly that I can bear any pains without tears but not divine love. A word uttered out of divine love is very sacred for me. And yesterday’s class had lots of such moments.

I have seen defensive and offensive people in my life. I have felt pain whenever I see such egoistic and egotistic people. But very rarely do I see a person who is humble.

I wonder where I stand, what to do and how to improve myself.

Those precious tears continue to tease me….

P.S. : Picture courtesy Google Images (apologies if it is a copyrighted one)

Spread Love

How much ever I tried to avert my mental direction, I happened to see or feel the dalliances of agitations born out of closed minds. I am aware that I need to walk miles and miles to achieve the state equanimity . However, I try not to go to that extent of explicitly expressing my negative emotions if any.

To avoid the effervescence of agitations in my mind due to expressed agitations of other minds, either I learn to close my eyes & ears physically or learn to close my physical vision with eyes & ears open, so I thought.

Well, the wisdom whispered into my ears an hour ago not to waste my time and energy in reacting to others’ agitations and also reminded me of the higher realities that I aspire for. That’s a profound realization on Amara Jayanti Day i.e. February 1, 2010.

My love and respects to the great Maharishi Amara, Guru of my Guruji.

I am committed………..with renewed vigour today to spread only divine vibrations of Love and not agitations.

Angels or Demons

I have often seen people spitting venomous words on others as if they are perfect angels. Those who raise their voices, accuse and hurt others’ feelings deliberately are weaklings of highest order, which they don’t accept. If their intent is one of hatred, jealousy, pride or selfishness, they are worse than demons.


On the contrary, real angels

• don’t manipulate situations or people.
• don’t know how to punish those who do harm to them.
• know only to help, support and guide even their enemies.
• exude goodness always which they themselves are not aware of.
• don’t know how to act ‘smart’.
• never think or presume that they are great or correct always.
• are pure and peaceful souls.


Becoming an angel or a demon is our choice. And let’s be ready to face the fruit(s) of our choice.

Universe is watching you...

I vividly remember Guruji’s words when I met him in Antar Manasa, “The Universe always helps…” These simple words practically gave me a sudden realisation, for the miraculous turn of events before, during and after visiting him, made me believe them completely.

That goes to prove that Universe is watching me all the time (life after life) not to judge or punish but only to help me. This feeling of grace suddenly gave me total relief and freedom – from my past and future. I became a free bird instantly.

Yes, I was reborn at that moment, thanks to Guruji.

I am now sure that Universe is watching every single soul… just like it does watch me.